Notes from Evil Bender

There’s a thought-provoking post on that subject over at Feministing.

Let me preface the following by saying this: I am a straight, white man, and as such I am not certain that my opinion counts for much on this topic, and if any LGBT folks who read this blog want to deliver the smackdown on me for talking out of turn, I’ll humbly accept that as well deserved.

I don’t necessarily disagree with Pérez. In fact, my issues with the institution of marriage run deep enough that I plan to never marry. I feel that marriage, as it is practiced in our society, is a deeply flawed institution, probably fatally so. So I find nothing objectionable in the idea that we should be looking to change/undermine/subvert marriage.

But, honestly, I find that point to be essentially irrelevant to why I so vocally support gay marriage. (more after the fold)

I support Gay Marriage not because I think marriage is great, but because it’s just wrong that people should be denied the right to participate in a social and legal institution based on a comparison of their genitalia. I agitate for equal rights in marriage because it’s a part of equal rights in general, and because it seems to me that even if it is merely a symptom of a larger problem (and it probably is) it is so visible a symptom that it is an important point of contention. If we can get people to see that marriage isn’t for straight people only, maybe that will help them see that Gay folks are human too, and deserving of all the respect and rights that straight people have access to.

I hope that I am a help to those in the LGBT community, and if my approach is wrong, I want to be informed of that. My greatest fear on this subject is being part of the problem. Now, I don’t think that my position is in conflict with Pérez’s, nor do I assume I know how she would respond. I’m just throwing my view out there, and I would really appreciate hearing from my readers on this: what’s your take?