Thanks for the comment. I agree with a lot of what you’re saying, but I’d avoid the word “blame” in this context. It isn’t healthy for the “victim”–I’d like a better word here–to be blamed in any way. Might it be empowering for that person to take steps to feel more assured, safe, or in control.

I’m sure no one would disagree that such actions can be healthy and helpful. I just think we should be careful to separate those actions from “taking the blame,” which is a frame that implies culpability on the part of the one who was wronged.

I agree that people have a tendency to ‘blame the victim’ and this tendency is a widely studied cross cultural psychological phenomenon.

However, this posting brings up an interesting point about blame, responsibility and will. While no one should ever blame the victim, especially if that victim is a child. On the other hand, if I am the victim of a crime, it can be psychologically advantageous for me to take responsibility for preventing similar events in the future.

For example, if I leave my car unlocked and my ipod is stolen, I am not to blame for having it stolen. But then again, if I place 100% of the blame on the thief, then I am denying myself the opportunity for a feeling of control over future circumstances.

When talking about child sexual abuse, however, I’m not sure that it ever makes sense for the victim to own any of the blame.