Apparently heaven is not as awesome as we’ve been led to believe January 24, 2008
Posted by Evil Bender in News and politics, reproductive rights, wingnuts.trackback
I must admit to occasionally being confused by how anyone finds the traditional Christian version of heaven appealing. Even leaving aside the fluffy white clouds and baby-faced angels of pop culture, I wonder if sitting around singing praise songs and contemplating just how swell a guy God is strikes anyone as the best way to spend an eternity. I bet even good Christians are bored in church sometimes.
But what I really can’t figure out is why people who think that the afterlife is a perfect, eternal paradise always seem so worried about getting there. Maud Flanders once lamented about a near death experience that she was terrified that she was about to spend an eternity in paradise. While I tease, I understand that even belief in an afterlife is often cold comfort, even when it is believed in rather firmly.
But what really amazes me is when Christanists get so caught up in their causes that they denigrate their own idea of heaven:
Yes, it must be absolute hell up in heaven for all those fetuses. Now I realize that Varvel obviously doesn’t intend to lament how all those poor babies ended up in heaven, but authorial intent isn’t everything. And this cartoon depicts aborted fetuses lamenting that they got to heaven so quickly. I wonder if Varvel would be as willing to condemn god for the billions of naturally aborted fetuses, and the billions of children who were born and never made it to their first birthday.
Actually, I don’t wonder about that. Obviously he doesn’t worry about such moral problems, or the cartoon should have depicted instead the baby complaining to God about how poorly designed a system is when an estimated 15-20% of fertilized eggs never implant on the uterine wall.
But all that would require an understanding of complexity and nuance that this cartoonist is obviously incapable of displaying. After all, he’s advocating that women be forced to give birth to babies, many of whom, in Christian doctrine, would grow up, live their lives, and go strait to hell. Presumably he’d okay with that, as at least they get to blow out birthday candles once a year for eternity.
You’d think people like Varvel would take a moment to think about what they’re really saying. But I suppose thoughtfulness isn’t a trait that’s selected for in the world of wingnut cartooning.
I went to my Aunt’s funeral a few months ago and when the Minister said that he just knew that my Aunt was up in heaven right now, with a huge smile on her face, worshipping Jesus, the whole absurdity hit me very strongly. An eternity as a butt-kissing yes man to some egomanical deity? Sounds like heaven to me.
I couldn’t help but be reminded of the argument Norman Geisler used in legitimizing the slaughter of Canannite children at the hands of the Israelites – it was an act of mercy because they hadn’t reached the “age of reason” yet, and therefore, went to heaven.
Life is good, love is grand… (he’s ok with that, not he’d. Or ‘Presumably, he’d ok that’)
(Good thing you have someone here to point out typos, EB. Shoot.) Actually, I’ve been thinking about the whole “heaven” thing lately. I’m not sure where Christian tradition lost sight of the “new heavens and new earth” business. When I read Christian apocalyptic literature, it really seems like the idea is to RE-create the cosmos. I don’t think the afterlife has much to do with the puffy cloud stuff. I mean, I believe in an afterlife. I just think it will be a lot more recognizable than some Christians presume. Throughout the Bible, redemption and creation go hand-in-hand. I think the Christian scriptures speak of God perfecting creation rather than promoting escapism. Check out Revelation sometime and see what you think.
I usually wouldn’t point out a typo, but the editorial seemed best topped by a comment of the same flavor. Both comments inconvenience their authors simply to misinterpret to the point of insult. My motive was illustration, though probably not that effective. A God who cares enough to design a system fertilization, where sperm somehow ‘knows’ which way to swim, and to penetrate the egg cell, egg cell allows this, DNA somehow know to untwist and trade info, egg knows to implant and uterine wall accepts implantation, develops a placental wall that efficiently allows mother and fetus’ blood to exchange oxygen and nutrients, but never mixes blood, (which would be fatal); All this wrapped in the beautiful package we all know and love, sex. This God can chose my day to go.
My apologies for nit-picking.
When my Dad died, we had to do that whole catholic ritual crap. (it was VERY hard to find a catholic priest in Little Rock, AK to perform the last rites)
I’ve never been a fan as catholicism often touts the whole “St. Peter at the pearly gates” crap, purgatory and Dante’s vision of hell. Lets not forget Bosch’s visual interpretation of it.
I think these visuals were meant to comfort in the time of death. Yes, my father suffered very much and I do believe his death was a release. I hardly believe that a fertilized egg has a developed conscience and can feel anything. As a matter of fact, some of those embryos could have probably saved my father’s life.
Anyway, I like to think of heaven as a bar–you can drink and smoke but never get too drunk. all your friends who passed on before you are partying in the bar with you. It’s my own coping mechanism. while I don’t think there is an afterlife, the my own invention makes sense to me.